Where Will I Put All My Stuff?

If you're a Tiny House Enthusiast, you have no doubt heard about all the benefits of downsizing.  And if you think about it purely from a logical standpoint, having less stuff means having less stuff to worry about, store, clean, pay for, and maintain.  And that makes sense, right?

Have you ever considered the other things that clutter our lives?  Like relationships?  If you think about it, our lives start out pretty simple and then get increasingly complex as we mature.  With maturity comes relationships and, literally, the same logic can be applied to those as well.  The more relationships you have the more people you have to worry about, store (keep a roof over their heads) clean (or, rather, clean up after) pay for, and maintain. (can you say "New shoes for my growing son, every three months!?)

Question: So, why is downsizing our possessions touted as one of the first steps towards an increased emphasis on relationships; if they both yield the same end result? 

Answer:  Our emotions.

Relationships pay us back by enriching our lives.  We share with others, and they share with us.  We teach others, and they teach us.  We love others, and if all goes well, they love us back.  Good relationships feed our soul, give us solace, teach us how to be patient, and how to be empathetic. 

Does our stuff provide us with peace, solace, and love?

As people enter our lives they bring, stuff.  We then start to correlate stuff, to people; we assign emotional value to possessions. For instance, we become sentimental about a painting done by our first grade daughter, and we remember an important life event from a printed program or memorabilia.  (This is not a bad thing, by the way.) It's actually an easy and efficient way for our brains to recall that event.  The "bad" part, is that we tend to then become indiscriminate about what possessions we assign value to.  Perhaps we don't trust our brains to remember the "important" events? Or perhaps we want to surround ourselves with things to remind us that we are living a fulfilling life?

Wow!  My Tiny House really IS TINY!! 

The key here is not to assign any value to any things.  They key is to do so, discriminately.  And that leads us back to the difficult process of downsizing. 

Question: If assigning discriminate value to our stuff makes so much sense, logically, then why is it so difficult?

Answer:  Because we are forcing ourselves to re-learn, to what and whom, we should assign value to.

So, how exactly do you decide what goes, and what stays; when you're trying to downsize into a Tiny House?

Frankly, I don't know how it will work for you.  After all, downsizing is so personal.  It's an entirely different event for each person, bringing with it an entirely new set of baggage.  (mine is in a bin, marked "LUGGAGE") I don't have the answers for you but here are a few examples of the thought processes that have been playing, over and over in my head, for the last few months.  Maybe they'll inspire you to begin your own....

I had two small, handmade, clay bowls.  They were both pretty, and earthy, and made by the students of someone with whom I once had a close relationship.  I attended a fund raising event where I paid $10, per bowl, to fill it with soup and then got to take home the bowls.  One, I used for pencils.  The other one sat in the cupboard waiting for a purpose that it never ended up serving.  As I looked at the bowls I realized I was keeping them because they reminded me of how giving I was.  As I contemplated them further, however, I also realized they entered my life as a result of a relationship which was now a painful life lesson.  Not wanting to be reminded of that pain, they were both recently donated to charity. 

Only two bins of the original four, are left.

(and 3 bags of donations!)

Good feelings return, lesson learned, now moving on.......

I was raised in a less than affluent family.  I did not have nice, or trendy clothes.  I got by with the basics but, as a foster child, I was happy to have any at all.  As I matured (there's that word again) and earned my own money I spent a LOT of it in my early 20's on clothes and shoes.  Even if I didn't need yet another white button town oversized shirt, I bought one because it was on sale, or because I COULD.   In retrospect, I believe that the difference between age and maturity is understanding the difference between things you CAN do and things you SHOULD do.  Nowadays, I don't have nearly the stuffed closet and dresser as I used to; but the feelings still challenge me when I shop.  "I deserve it"  "I work so hard" "I want to look good, so I'll feel good about myself"  These are all tough life lessons that reveal themselves in how we view our stuff. 

These are the same tough life lessons that we are forced to re-learn as we downsize.

Is your stuff a reflection of who you are?  A parent, a builder, a daughter, a son, a mentor, a gardener, or a philanthropic traveler?  To what extent do you rely on things to remind you of who you are, or are your things on display so others will believe that you are, who you want them to believe you are?

Think about it this way.  If you have a 12 foot long wall, full of pictures of your children and grandchildren, does this make you a stellar parent?  Or does it reflect more on how you wish others to see you?  If you have exercise equipment gathering dust, is this a reflection of the healthy person you want to see yourself as?  Can and should you, instead, assign that same sense of identity to a pair of running shoes?

Downsizing is really, really, really, difficult.  It is sometimes not quite as easy as the "one bin for donations, one bin for keeps, and one bin for garbage" process.  The process of even deciding that you want to, and need to get rid of, the emotions you assign to your stuff, and embracing the mental roadblocks; is what keeps most people from even considering a Tiny House.

After all, where would they (or you) put all their (or your) stuff?

My "stuff" (which is a rather thoughtless and crass description of the treasures that will be left) will be creatively and proudly displayed, and some of it may be stored.  But in either case, they will be cherished and/or cared for, and a far more clear reflection of both myself and the relationships I have built along the way of building My Empty Nest.

Becoming Tiny House Smart(er)

The best part about being a tiny little part of the Tiny House movement is the sense of community that I discover when corresponding, or talking, with other Tiny House enthusiasts.  And the one thing I keep hearing over and over is that, above all, thorough planning is the key to success when building a Tiny House. 

(or, money, but I don’t have a lot of that so………I digress)

In the best interest of doing said planning I reached out to a local company who builds them, and this past weekend I had the opportunity to tour Tiny Smart House; and visit with Nathan The Founder.  (Yes, I am aware that appears to be a Viking-like way of introducing him….but it suits him well.)  It was my first opportunity to see a Tiny House in the making….and I was not disappointed.   

Building Tiny Houses requires a diverse set of skills, and while I have many of them, I felt more than privileged to be in the company of someone who possesses those I do not.  Nathan showed me around his unassuming but very functional space which features not one but TWO trailers in progress.

Since I am at the very beginning of my build (ie; still firmly mired in the aforementioned planning stage) my intention for visiting Nathan was primarily to learn more about the foundation; ie; the trailer.  During the course of our discussion, however, the conversation also wandered to subjects like siding, walls, insulation, venting, timeline and even my budget. 

So, what did I learn?

1)      If I install a certain type of composting toilet, all of my male guests will have to sit down to pee.  (Who’d thunk?!)

2)      Putting a bedroom loft over a bathroom or kitchen requires additional venting / moisture control steps to avoid the creation of a mold-rich-environment under the mattress.  (Ick!!)

3)      1/8” bead board for my walls isn’t the best idea, because it bows. (Darn.) 

4)      Spray in foam insulation adds significant stability to the house.  (Good to know!)

5)      Putting the door on the side of the house means that I will need to plan for lot of extra bracing and strapping near the door to minimize adjustments that will need to be made to the door after the twist-inducing transport. (Hmm, I would have never guessed it.)

6)      Lots more stuff that I should have written down so I would remember them.  (Sheesh!)

So, what does Nathan specialize in?

Everything!

If you are looking for an all-around good guy who knows a lot about building licensed Tiny Houses, Nathan is your guy.  His consulting fees are more than reasonable, his knowledge base is deep, and he’s quite flexible with figuring out how he can help while also saving DIY’ers like me; money.

Tiny Smart House can also rent you a dry space to build your own house or they can build you a trailer to put your house on.  They can consult with you on design challenges, sell you one of their model homes, or design and build one that suits your needs. 

Just think!  All you need is a vision, a bit of money, some of Nathan’s great advice, patience, passion, a little luck, a dash of get-er-done, and……TA DA!!!……you’ll have a Tiny House all your own.

So, last but not least, why am I sharing my “secrets” with you?

My day job requires that I sit in a cubicle all day long.  It’s tedious but pays the bills.  If I sound positively enthusiastic (maybe a bit TOO enthusiastic?) about all of this Tiny House "nonsense" (as my parents would call it) it’s because I am quite literally giddy about getting out of my padded grey box to creatively collaborate with helpful (and nice) people like Nathan. (cubicle comparison to solitary confinement comment, intentionally withheld.)

And, by the way, Nathan didn’t ask me to write this review.  I offered to.  I firmly believe in this movement, the dedicated people in it, and how much work there is to be done in advancing the “Less is More” philosophy.  If this glowing recommendation of Nathan and his humble company beside the freeway in Albany Oregon helps someone else realize their Tiny House dream, then my work here is done.

Tiny House Planners Unite!

P.S.  I'll try not to use so many parenthesis next time, but no promises.

You Never Know What The Answer Will Be, Until You Ask!

A few weeks ago it snowed in Portland Oregon.  While snow is not necessarily a rarity, it happens so infrequently that the city and towns are not prepared with plows and salt and the end result is that everyone pretty much just stays home until it melts.  (or they gather the courage to drive in it or borrow a neighbor’s 4X4.)

It was during this particular snowed-in scenario that I downloaded Andrew Odom's book, "Your Message Here", and DEVOURED it in just a couple of hours.  (partially because that’s what you do when you've been indoors for 4 days with 2 kids and are sick of watching TV and the house is already clean, and partially because it was the EXACT book I needed but hadn't yet formally started my search)

                                                           But I digress……..

The concept of getting sponsors for my project was something I was considering but I had not yet really wrapped my head around exactly HOW to go about doing it and WHAT I could offer my sponsors in exchange for their generosity.  Andrew’s book gave me the exact answers to those questions and he did so in such a succinct and easy-to-comprehend manner I put his suggestions to work within hours of finishing the last page!

So far, I already have 5 companies who have agreed to donate the exact materials I requested, in exchange for only a Thank You and link to their website on facebook. ( Really? Yep.  I can do that!)  I also have 2 national level sponsors who are positively enthusiastic about my supporting my project, and are currently pushing my sponsorship request through the authorization channels.   (Incidentally, none of them have heard of, or even seen, a Tiny House.) 

So, how did I do it?

In a nutshell, I used the suggestions in Andrew’s book and put my own little Let’s-Get-This-Done spin on it:

Step 1 – Had my 17 year old computer whiz kid son create my project (aka My Empty Nest) logo in Photoshop.  Ordered business cards immediately with said logo on them.

Step 2- Brainstormed a list of potential sponsors that would align with the materials I needed. Researched said sponsors to determine their marketing strategy and if their corporate goals and values aligned with My Empty Nest’s goals and values.  (Sustainability, minimalism, social responsibility, use of reclaimed materials, and a creative approach to solving problems)

Step 3 – Wrote up a template for a sponsorship request email and developed My Empty Nest’s sponsorship “outline” which clearly and easily defining what my sponsors would receive in exchange.  (Thank you, again, Andrew for making this soooo easy!!) Also, I developed a Tiny House Overview sheet with web links to ease with their research and build excitement for the Tiny House movement in general.

Steps 1 thru 3 took just a few hours!

Step 4 – Started making phone calls to sponsors, asking who their marketing manager was and their email address .  Started sending emails and logging the information I had gathered into an Excel spreadsheet so I knew who was who, and when and how I had contacted them. 

Step 5 – Followed up via phone call if I did not hear back from them within 7 days.

Step 6 – Noted their response on my spreadsheet and immediately sent out thank you cards to anyone I had talked to, thanking them for their time, regardless of their response.

That’s it!   Six Easy Steps to Make Andrew’s Book Work for You!

I have to admit.  I am amazed at the generosity, enthusiasm, and overall support I have received from everyone I have talked to.  Even if they could not sponsor me, for whatever reason (Did you know there is a shortage of reclaimed barn wood in the Northwest right now?) they were encouraging and gave me great advice.  I did reach out to a few people with whom I already had a relationship with but most of them were just cold calls / emails and I have been, so far, impressed with the professionalism with which they have responded.

Thank You, Andrew, for writing such a useful book. 

Thank You for your dedication to the Tiny House movement.

Thank You for your tireless tenacity on behalf of all of those who come after you.

Finally, Thank You for teaching me that “You’ll never know what the answer will be, until you ASK!” 

Invasion of the Tiny House People!

I have a large, dusty, project room; which really isn't that unusual I suppose.  What is unusual, however, is the fact that my project room has beige carpet (that is covered up with flattened cardboard boxes duct taped together) a fireplace (which I have not yet ever used) and glorious, huge, arching windows. You see, before it was my project room it was, for ever so brief of a moment, my formal living room.  Since I cannot envision such a large unused space; I am using it for all things that need sanding, painting, taking apart, putting together, and storing. (ie. my next-in-line projects)

 

What does my messy project room have to do with Tiny House People?

 

This is a test. If you are one, you "get it" that I would risk a negative first impression from my guests in favor of a more practical use of warm space.  You understand that I would repurpose a large space in pursuit or a larger, grander, life goal:  To build my own Tiny House.

 

Yes.  I am one of those.  I am a Tiny House Person.

 

The more I consider moving on to the next phase of my life, and the more I reach out to others who are doing the same, the more I realize that we all have so much in common.  Hipsters, hippies, mid-lifers, empty nesters, single or married; we're all a little nuts about our projects and spaces and this movement. (Or a lot inspiring, depending on your perspective.)

 

So I ask.........Are you a Tiny House Person?

 

Is your husband, wife, girlfriend, guy friend, significant other, roommate, sibling, or daughter one too?

 

How would you know if your life is being invaded by these crazy people? 

 

Three Ways to Tell if You, or Someone You Know, is a Tiny House Person

 

1) We envision a life, much different, than our life now - Some, dare I say the majority of people, are OK with doing things as they've always done.  They don't risk a lot, dream a lot, live a lot, or push themselves beyond their comfortable boundaries.  They key word here is "comfortable".  Pushing oneself is distinctly uncomfortable, unfamiliar, and down right scary.  Tiny House people are not like most people.  Those same concepts that make other people sweaty-palms nervous; we find exhilarating, empowering, and exciting.  We network, email, blog, surf, meet, write, and drink over unending conversations about all things Tiny and simple.  (sometimes at the expense of normal conversation with normal people about normal concepts like movies, and movie stars.) 

 

2) We see things not for what they are, but for what they will be -  I drove by a pallet factory not far from my house today and saw a house sized dumpster, full of cast offs, presumably going to the chipper.  What did I see?  Siding!!!  Tiny House people see an old galvanized watering can and think "Showerhead!!!!"  We happen upon a picture of a pile of wooden milk crates in the free section of craigslist, and visions of kitchen shelves dance in our heads.  We use materials nobody wants, and repurpose cast offs so they can live a new life.  (Sometimes, however, we butt heads with The Collectors.  I'm still trying to get My Love to give me his vintage ski poles, complete with weathered leather and bamboo baskets, to use as curtain rods.)

 

3) Simplicity is not merely a movement we read about, it is our life's goal - I grew up in the money grubbing 80's when Wall Street was an enviable career goal, when BMW and IZOD was king, and the notion of a 3 bedroom, 2 bathroom, rambler with a husband and two kids was a virtually inescapable fate.  Don't get me wrong.  It's not necessarily a bad thing and I've been there, done that. What WAS wrong, however, was society's lack of emphasis or exposure to creative ideas, innovation, and philanthropy. Simplicity was a virtually non-existent concept. In sharp but welcome contrast, the Tiny Houser's of today are positively energized by the notion of throwing out all the things we have collected that mean more to others, than ourselves.  We simply cannot wait till the day when we wake up to a simple cup of coffee, a loved one or two, a cat (or five) and start our day knowing that the speed in which we accomplish our tasks is far less important than the meaning we create while doing so.  Less, truly is more.

 

"Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication."  Leonardo Da Vinci

 

So, if you are a Tiny House person or love one, and are afraid of what that means...... maybe it's time to embrace this newfound identity?  Maybe it's time to cast aside fear and the nay-sayers?  Maybe it's your turn to make a difference in this world, even if it's only one Tiny House at a time?

 

If you have read this list and determined that you are not indeed a Tiny House Person, have no fear.  We're not monsters. (though the jury's still out on the whole "crazy" verdict.)  Just take a deep breath and accept that this is the time to embrace the change-is-good concept.  It's time to learn and accept that they are here to stay and they're not like you.  Tiny House people actually love the idea of junk shopping, and dreadlocks, and combining vinegar and steel wool to create a that perfect shade of  "barn wood" on brand new 1x6's.......for our ceiling.

 

Vive la différence!!!

My Story

If you were to ask me why I am excited about living in a Tiny House, I would tell you that the list is so long we’ll have to sit, and chat for a bit, for you to understand how perfectly perfect the idea is, to me.  You see, the answer isn’t simple. 

The answer is…my life’s story……

I have worked since I was 15 years old.  Most of those years have been spent in front of a desk, and a computer, and working for someone else.  Problem solving and resource management has always been my strong suit and I enjoy my work but I have no intention of sitting in a cubicle till I’m 70 years old.  (or even 60!) I want to explore more creative, active, and social career endeavors.  Having a paid-for Tiny House will give me the flexibility to do just that.  It’s finally time that I put my problem solving skills to use for myself.  

And I can’t wait to get started!

I have been married and divorced twice.  Each time, I designed and then supervised the construction of “our” home.   I landscaped, and painted, and stenciled, and mowed, and put all of my emotional and financial self into our new space.   With each divorce, the house was left behind, in the pile of carnage, that was once (twice) the plan for my life.  I have, since then, vowed to never let the success or failure of a relationship dictate my domestic security.  I’ve been on my own, dependent on nobody but myself, for over ten years now.  My Tiny House will finally fill that void, the hole in my soul, it will be my emotional security blanket.  It will be the end result of my creative and financial efforts.  

I’ll finally have my own space in this world that nobody can take from me.

Words can hardly express how excited I am to be moving on to the Empty Next phase of my life. I am a single mom and sole provider and have devoted my life to raising responsible, respectful, children.  My youngest is going off to college next year and, as such, there will no longer be a need to maintain an expensive, suburban, three bedroom, two bathroom, yard and garage lifestyle.   So far, however, this transition hasn’t exactly been easy for me.   Redefining my role with my children (my oldest is already 18 and in college) and redefining my role to the world has been harder than I thought it would be.  Who am I?  What do I do?  “Mom” has always been the answer.  Granted, I will always be “Mom” but to a much lesser extent than before.  They won’t need me.  My job is done.

It’s time for me to find, me, again.

If there is one thing I have learned, it is that nothing in life goes according to plan.  My ability to roll with the punches, and get up after being knocked down, is one of my best attributes.  I don’t even think about where I want to live when I retire because I know that no matter how I see my future now, reality will be very different.  I don’t know if I’ll live in a bustling city where strolls to the coffee shop or farmers’ market will be a part of my everyday life.  I don’t know if I’ll live on a farm, and raise animals again, or next to a lake where I can greet the sunrise over the water with my pen and paper in hand.  My Tiny House can go where I go, it can be where I need and want to be. 

Whether I am alone, or with my love, I will be where I want to be.

My love is one of my biggest fans.  While he occasionally feels the need to inject reality into my Tiny House Fantasy (“You have over 50 pairs of shoes!  Even they won’t fit in a Tiny House) he also understands that once I get something in my head I won’t be talked out of it.   And although the exact logistical details of our future together remain a mystery, the Tiny House will provide us both with options we had not yet considered.  Maybe we’ll rent out his houses and pull the Tiny House to another state where we’ll live for 6 months, then move again.  Maybe I’ll live with him and we’ll park my Tiny House on his lakefront land for use as my personal escape space or a place where the kids can stay when they come to visit. 

Life is full of maybes, but with my Tiny House, I’m not afraid of them anymore.

It has been a few months since the idea of building my own Tiny House struck me, and although I am still in the planning stages, I can already smell the cookies baking in my vintage oven, in my tiny house, in a quiet lot, where ever I land.