“WHAT discussion
about sex in tiny houses?” you might ask.
Sex is one of those subjects (like composting toilets) where
everyone hopes you will tell them all of your dirtiest and most intimate
secrets while simultaneously hoping you won’t ask them to return the
favor. But, when I posed the question
“How is sex in tiny houses different than in a normal house?” on a popular facebook
page; there was no shortage of answers.
Apparently, tiny house enthusiasts are a pretty open bunch of
people. Who’d thunk?
So, before I begin, I have to confess:
1)
Even though I am building a tiny house in my own
driveway, I have not had sex in it. (yet)
2)
I have also not had sex in a car. (and I’ve owned one of those for over 30
years!)
Why confess, now? To
help you understand how very inexperienced I am with this subject matter. Knowing that, it only makes sense that I would
ask strangers to help with my research.
(insert flirty wink
here….)
First off, the dozens of people who responded to my query
can pretty much be divided into two categories; those who live in a tiny house
with kids, and those that don’t. It
seems, and would be logical, that the subject of privacy and sex go hand in
hand in such a small space. (Actually…. everything goes hand in hand, in such a
small space, but I digress….)
Secondly, the issues of sex in a loft space vs a first floor
bedroom also came to light as it appears that sleeping (or not) in a loft
requires a bit more dexterity than some tiny houses enthusiasts possess.
Ancient History – Sex in small spaces is nothing new. Our ancestors had no shame in conducting
their business in close proximity to everyone in the family, separated only by
a blanket. It was considered a normal
part of life and communal family living.
As our society has progressed, however, sex has evolved into a more
private affair. Today, as it turns out,
there are still some who are willing to buck the trend of sexual privacy and
either ask their children to wear headphones, or wait until they go to
sleep. As one respondent explains “that’s
what they make sheets for.”
Play Dates – If you’re living in a tiny house, with kids,
however, that awkward talk about “mommy and daddy” time doesn’t have to be a
sweat inducing conversation. Some tiny
house parents choose to merely wait until their children have gone to school,
or a friend’s house, to engage in coitus.
I have to admit; it brings to mind a whole new meaning to the terms
“play date” and “Romper Room”. In that
scenario, sex in a tiny house really isn’t much different than a normally sized
home, unless you’re in a loft of course.
Lofty Lovin’ – Amongst tiny house enthusiasts, there are
adamant proponents on each side of the loft vs main floor bedroom
discussions. Most of these discussions
focus on age related issues and reluctance to climb stairs with no rails, or inability
to climb them at all. When you introduce
the idea of sex in lofts, however, the subject takes on a whole new shade of
fun. Apparently, leverage for the lucky
lover on the bottom is a key pleasure factor.
Footprints on the ceiling, anyone?
Also, since there is no room for a bedframe, there is no bedframe to
move or squeak. Bonus! Looking for something to hold onto? One of the respondents enthusiastically
reported that she and her husband installed permanent handles at the head of
the bed. Sex on the stairs? Given that the last step is commonly 18”
tall, or more, it apparently serves as the perfect perch height for the more
brave and balanced amongst us.
Ladders, Ladders, and more Ladders – Even if you have a first
floor bedroom in a tiny house you probably also have a ladder to access
storage. Or, if you have a loft, you
have a loft ladder. Either way, THIS is
the kind of kinky fun I am looking forward to.
Ladder + Silk Scarves + Feathers (or leather) = Fun. So….about all those fun dreams that you’ll
have now; you’re welcome. In all honesty, I cannot take full credit for this
idea but the guy who came up with this idea won’t; so the burden is left to
me.
All The Time in the World – Nine months after large
snowstorms, it is very common for local hospitals to see a small increase in
the births of new babies in that same area.
When people find themselves with extra time on their hands, without the
distractions of everyday life activities like work, and school, and TV; they
have sex. If you ask tiny house
occupants what they enjoy most about the tiny house lifestyle, they often quote
“more time” as a factor for the uptick in their quality of life. If they’re spending less time cleaning or
working to pay a mortgage, they have more time for doing the activities they
love….like hiking and biking and traveling; and sex. And what are these
occupants doing when they’re not doing all of that? They are planning to have sex. They’re installing brackets for swinging
chairs, handles on the ceiling over the shower, and bolting the kitchen
cabinets to the walls.
In many ways, love lives are really no different in tiny
houses than they are in normal sized houses.
People will always find a time, and a place, to express their naked
desires. In a car, in an elevator, on a
park bench, or their parent’s bedroom…..they’re all fair game. I am really not surprised that since the
people who live in tiny houses are very intentional about what they find time
and space for in their lives, and homes (and because it’s one of the sheer joys
of being an adult) sex often makes the list.
The stair perching, ladder tying, handle installing, cabinet bolting,
list.
I better stop here.
I’m blushing….
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